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In Defense of Women

by H. L. Mencken

Length: 44,260 words, about 177 pages, about 3 hours to read

Essays and ideas, Satire and humour

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1. The Maternal Instinct

A man’s women folk, whatever their outward show of respect for his merit and authority, always regard him secretly as an ass, and with something akin to pity. His most gaudy sayings and doings seldom deceive them; they see the actual man within, and know him for a shallow and pathetic fellow. In this fact, perhaps, lies one of the best proofs of feminine intelligence, or, as the common phrase makes it, feminine intuition. The mark of that so-called intuition is simply a sharp and accurate perception of reality, an habitual immunity to emotional enchantment, a relentless capacity for distinguishing clearly between the appearance and the substance. The appearance, in the normal family circle, is a hero, magnifico, a demigod. The substance is a poor mountebank.

The proverb that no man is a hero to his valet is obviously of masculine manufacture. It is both insincere and untrue: insincere because it merely masks the egotistic doctrine that he is potentially a hero to everyone else, and untrue because a valet, being a fourth-rate man himself, is likely to be the last person in the world to penetrate his master’s charlatanry. Who ever heard of valet who didn’t envy his master wholeheartedly? who wouldn’t willingly change places with his master? who didn’t secretly wish that he was his master? A man’s wife labours under no such naive folly.

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2. Women’s Intelligence

The intelligence of women, forsooth! As well devote a laborious time to the sagacity of serpents, pickpockets, or Holy Church!

Women, in truth, are not only intelligent; they have almost a monopoly of certain of the subtler and more utile forms of intelligence. The thing itself, indeed, might be reasonably described as a special feminine character; there is in it, in more than one of its manifestations, a femaleness as palpable as the femaleness of cruelty, masochism or rouge. Men are strong. Men are brave in physical combat. Men have sentiment. Men are romantic, and love what they conceive to be virtue and beauty. Men incline to faith, hope and charity. Men know how to sweat and endure. Men are amiable and fond. But in so far as they show the true fundamentals of intelligence—in so far as they reveal a capacity for discovering the kernel of eternal verity in the husk of delusion and hallucination and a passion for bringing it forth—to that extent, at least, they are feminine, and still nourished by the milk of their mothers. “Human creatures,” says George, borrowing from Weininger, “are never entirely male or entirely female; there are no men, there are no women, but only sexual majorities.” Find me an obviously intelligent man, a man free from sentimentality and illusion, a man hard to deceive, a man of the first class, and I’ll show you a man with a wide streak of woman in him. Bonaparte had it; Goethe had it; Schopenhauer had it; Bismarck and Lincoln had it; in Shakespeare, if the Freudians are to be believed, it amounted to downright homosexuality.

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5. The Thing Called Intuition

Intuition? With all respect, bosh! Then it was intuition that led Darwin to work out the hypothesis of natural selection. Then it was intuition that fabricated the gigantically complex score of “Die Walkure.” Then it was intuition that convinced Columbus of the existence of land to the west of the Azores. All this intuition of which so much transcendental rubbish is merchanted is no more and no less than intelligence—intelligence so keen that it can penetrate to the hidden truth through the most formidable wrappings of false semblance and demeanour, and so little corrupted by sentimental prudery that it is equal to the even more difficult task of hauling that truth out into the light, in all its naked hideousness. Women decide the larger questions of life correctly and quickly, not because they are lucky guessers, not because they are divinely inspired, not because they practise a magic inherited from savagery, but simply and solely because they have sense. They see at a glance what most men could not see with searchlights and telescopes; they are at grips with the essentials of a problem before men have finished debating its mere externals. They are the supreme realists of the race. Apparently illogical, they are the possessors of a rare and subtle super-logic. Apparently whimsical, they hang to the truth with a tenacity which carries them through every phase of its incessant, jellylike shifting of form. Apparently unobservant and easily deceived, they see with bright and horrible eyes. In men, too, the same merciless perspicacity sometimes shows itself—men recognized to be more aloof and uninflammable than the general—men of special talent for the logical—sardonic men, cynics. Men, too, sometimes have brains.

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6. How Marriages are Arranged

Turn, for example, to the field in which the two sexes come most constantly into conflict, and in which, as a result, their habits of mind are most clearly contrasted—to the field, to wit, of monogamous marriage. Surely no long argument is needed to demonstrate the superior competence and effectiveness of women here, and therewith their greater self-possession, their saner weighing of considerations, their higher power of resisting emotional suggestion. The very fact that marriages occur at all is a proof, indeed, that they are more cool-headed than men, and more adept in employing their intellectual resources, for it is plainly to a man’s interest to avoid marriage as long as possible, and as plainly to a woman’s interest to make a favourable marriage as soon as she can. The efforts of the two sexes are thus directed, in one of the capital concerns of life, to diametrically antagonistic ends. Which side commonly prevails? I leave the verdict to the jury. All normal men fight the thing off; some men are successful for relatively long periods; a few extraordinarily intelligent and courageous men (or perhaps lucky ones) escape altogether. But, taking one generation with another, as every one knows, the average man is duly married and the average woman gets a husband. Thus the great majority of women, in this clear-cut and endless conflict, make manifest their substantial superiority to the great majority of men.

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12. Honour

Perhaps one of the chief charms of woman lies precisely in the fact that they are dishonorable, i.e., that they are relatively uncivilized. In the midst of all the puerile repressions and inhibitions that hedge them round, they continue to show a gipsy spirit. No genuine woman ever gives a hoot for law if law happens to stand in the way of her private interest. She is essentially an outlaw, a rebel, what H. G. Wells calls a nomad. The boons of civilization are so noisily cried up by sentimentalists that we are all apt to overlook its disadvantages. Intrinsically, it is a mere device for regimenting men. Its perfect symbol is the goose-step. The most civilized man is simply that man who has been most successful in caging and harnessing his honest and natural instincts-that is, the man who has done most cruel violence to his own ego in the interest of the commonweal. The value of this commonweal is always overestimated. What is it at bottom? Simply the greatest good to the greatest number—of petty rogues, ignoramuses and poltroons.

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10 of the best lines

A man’s women folk, whatever their outward show of respect for his merit and authority, always regard him secretly as an ass, and with something akin to pity.

1. The Maternal InstinctKeep reading from here

The truth is that neither sex, without some fertilization by the complementary characters of the other, is capable of the highest reaches of human endeavour.

2. Women’s IntelligenceKeep reading from here

They see at a glance what most men could not see with searchlights and telescopes; they are at grips with the essentials of a problem before men have finished debating its mere externals.

5. The Thing Called IntuitionKeep reading from here

He may want a cook and not a partner in his business, or a partner in his business and not a cook.

6. How Marriages are ArrangedKeep reading from here

One would relatively speaking, almost caress him by spitting into his eye.

10. The Process of DelusionKeep reading from here

The boons of civilization are so noisily cried up by sentimentalists that we are all apt to overlook its disadvantages.

12. HonourKeep reading from here

In the same way, I have no doubt, the majority of foxes would object to choosing lots to determine the victim of a projected fox-hunt. They prefer to take their chances with the dogs.

22. Compulsory MarriageKeep reading from here

Men will keep on pursuing women until hell freezes over, and women will keep luring them on.

32. The Woman VoterKeep reading from here

Man is always looking for someone to boast to; woman is always looking for a shoulder to put her head on.

37. Women as MartyrsKeep reading from here

In other words, is friendship possible without sex? Many a woman of the new order dismisses the problem with another question: Why without sex?

42. The Transvaluation of ValuesKeep reading from here

All 62 In Defense of Women quotes, with the words around each

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Contents

All 53 parts
  1. Introduction
  2. I. The Feminine Mind
  3. 1. The Maternal Instinct
  4. 2. Women’s Intelligence
  5. 3. The Masculine Bag of Tricks
  6. 4. Why Women Fail
  7. 5. The Thing Called Intuition
  8. II. The War Between the Sexes
  9. 6. How Marriages are Arranged
  10. 7. The Feminine Attitude
  11. 8. The Male Beauty
  12. 9. Men as Aesthetes
  13. 10. The Process of Delusion
  14. 11. Biological Considerations
  15. 12. Honour
  16. 13. Women and the Emotions
  17. 14. Pseudo-Anaesthesia
  18. 15. Mythical Anthropophagi
  19. 16. A Conspiracy of Silence
  20. III. Marriage
  21. 17. Fundamental Motives
  22. 18. The Process of Courtship
  23. 19. The Actual Husband
  24. 20. The Unattainable Ideal
  25. 21. The Effect on the Race
  26. 22. Compulsory Marriage
  27. 23. Extra-Legal Devices
  28. 24. Intermezzo on Monogamy
  29. 25. Late Marriages
  30. 26. Disparate Unions
  31. 27. The Charm of Mystery
  32. 28. Woman as Wife
  33. 29. Marriage and the Law
  34. 30. The Emancipated Housewife
  35. IV. Woman Suffrage
  36. 31. The Crowning Victory
  37. 32. The Woman Voter
  38. 33. A Glance Into the Future
  39. 34. The Suffragette
  40. 35. A Mythical Dare-Devil
  41. 36. The Origin of a Delusion
  42. 37. Women as Martyrs
  43. 38. Pathological Effects
  44. 39. Women as Christians
  45. 40. Piety as a Social Habit
  46. 41. The Ethics of Women
  47. V. The New Age
  48. 42. The Transvaluation of Values
  49. 43. The Lady of Joy
  50. 44. The Future of Marriage
  51. 45. Effects of the War
  52. 46. The Eternal Romance
  53. 47. Apologia in Conclusion

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About this edition

Text from Project Gutenberg. In the public domain in the USA. The Project Gutenberg License is kept inside the file. Every passage and line on this page is the book's own words, checked against the text.